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- I'm surely not the world's greatest lover
- I never had much charm or savoir faire
- And I don't have the wealth of Rockefeller
- But when it comes to romance I'm the richest man around
- I have a reputation with the ladies in this town
- Sometimes people ask me for the secret that I found
- How do I make those young hearts skip a beat?
- Well... I sleep neat.
-
- I sleep neat
- From my head down to my feet
- I have that sense of confidence
- When I slide onto the sheet
- When it comes to bedroom etiquette
- My training is complete
- That's all there is to it, I sleep neat
-
- Now most men misdirect their concentration
- They try so hard, but always seem to fail
- I can, of course, relate to their frustration
- Because nothing cools a love life like a midnight tug
of war
- When you wake up cold and crabby like you did the night
before
- With the sheet around your shoulder and the blanket on
the floor
- Wise up, boys, and give those gals a treat
- Sleep neat. I sleep neat
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- Chorus
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- Now everyone who seeks romantic pleasure
- There's just one thing you really need to know
- Get your couchée discipline together
- A simple silk pajama is essential for good taste
- A twin-controlled electric is a must in every case
- A double bed is adequate any larger is a waste
- And matching spread and curtain would be sweet
- And sleep neat. I sleep neat
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