© 2006 Neal Gladstone
Have you seen Adhesive Steve
He’s the guest who wouldn’t leave
Small dogs and children flee
When he’s in their vicinity
Steve makes adhesive coats
For label tape and Post It notes
It’s always just a little hard to breathe
When you’re near Adhesive Steve
Steve always stands too close
You see the food stains on his shirt
You can smell his after shave
You can see his dental work
Thick hairs curl out his nose
And tangle up in matted groves
It’s always just a little hard to breathe
When you’re near Adhesive Steve
There is nothing you can do
Once big Steve is stuck on you
The more you try to wriggle free
The tighter his embrace will be
Brace will be Brace will be
Steve has a wife named Claire
But no one knows exactly where
She’s asking for divorce
But he won’t give her one of course
He says that they should stick it out
Cause that’s what love is all about
His unlucky wife just can’t believe
She’s stuck with Adhesive Steve
Steve sits in his special chair
And watches cop shows on TV
He likes to see them kick some butt
Maintaining our security
And then he has his late night snacks
Of sticky buns and chicken backs
Can you imagine what it’s like to be
Adhesive Steve