Seed in Muh Teeth

© 1987 Neal Gladstone

Well my love made me a sandwich with lots of raspberry jam

I thanked her most profusely cause that's the kinda guy I am

Well I took a bite and chewed it down

I rolled a soggy wad around

I really dug the crunchin sound

And when I was done I said, "Hon...

 

I got a seed in muh teeth and I just can't get it outa there

Well try as I might it's in so tight

And no matter what I do it's stuck like glue

Yes indeed (Whew w-w-whew)

I got a seed in muh teeth WELL

 

I looked into the mirror and I gave myself a scare

That seed was jammed in tighter than a rock star's underwear

Well I picked and tongued and brushed and cleaned

With dental floss and Listerine

With Spic and Span and Mr. Clean

And when I was done I said, "Hon....I

 

Well I went to see the dentist man and told him what was wrong

He pulled a giant needle out15 inches long

Well first he yanked my jaws apart

I screamed like hell and I bit him hard

He asked me for my mastercard

And when he was done he said "Son...you

 

Well I flew right down to Trinidad to see a gypsy woman

My Uncle Deek he told there this kind of thing is common

Well she made me drink a stinky brew

Of lizard balls and camel pooh

My hair fell out my tongue turned blue

And when she was done she said, "Mun...

 

Well I lost weight and got depressed - it was quite alarmin

Then one day my Uncle Deek said "Boy, you should take up farmin

Well, I filled my cheeks with corn and rice

They grew like mad to my surprise

I never had to fertilize

And I cross pollinize while I'm kissin

 

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