© 1987 Neal Gladstone

 

What am I doing here

You've made it very clear

That I should disappear

Alright , I'll do it

 

I gave you all I had

But you still treat me bad

Guess I should call a cab

Alright I'll do it

 

When you asked me to make love to you

In cycle boots with diapers on my head

I did it

When you tied me down with paperclips

And made me eat potato chips in bed

I did it

 

I sit by the telephone

Work on my muscle tone

Should I try silicone

Alright, I do it

 

My doctor says that I'm depressed

I should be friends with other men instead

Forget it

When other men ask me to spend

The night with them I always say drop dead

They do it

 

Heaven knows I have tried

To keep you satisfied

Now I'm thinking suicide

Alright, I'll do it

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