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Everybody Knows It
© 1986 Neal Gladstone
He was seeking a new direction
For his colored slide collection
Took a trans-Atlantic flight
For 7 days and 7 nights
Well you know the sign was hidden
Saying pictures are forbidden
So he focussed in his Nikon
On a sacred ancient icon
When a copper from the crowd
Shouted, "Pictures aren't allowed!"
As they clamped a rusty shackle on his limb
Everybody knows it but him
Her hair had barely finished drying
When her Afghan started crying
So she took him for a walk
Saw a neighbor, stopped to talk
Well her Afghan begged his pardon
In Miss Bentley's tulip garden
And Miss Bentley came out screaming
With her purple Mohawk gleaming
She was up for altercation
And demanded explanation
Of how such an outrage ever could occur
Everybody knows it but her
Now you can picket General Motors
Join the League of Women Voters
Have some world-wide adventures
Buy subordinate debentures
Be a star of motion pictures,
Marry rich and marry richer
But somewhere you always know it
Though you try hard not to show it
That you're shackled by a chain
To monotony and pain
And there's not a bloody thing that you can do
Everybody knows it but you
Well I can play in bars forever
Bleach my hair and dress in leather
Play a custom Telecaster
Use both hands to play it faster
Drive a Porche and wear and earring
Sing the blues and lose my hearing
See a doctor for depression
Get arrested for posession
But my dream to be a famous cock
Is nothing but a shameless crock
Of self-indulgent grandiosity
Everybody knows it but me!

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